Monday, November 12, 2012

A New Start to Healthy Eating

This competition I am doing is my way of crying out for help!  I have no intention of winning overall. I am so hopeful that someone out there needs this change as much as I did the first time I did a weight loss competition and that this will change their life. I will reach my goal and I will document the process every step of the way!  My goal will be lofty but attainable with a lot of hard work.  With my Savior’s help and the support of my amazing husband and kids I can do this!

A scale with a tape measure wrapped around it tied in a bow. The display window says HELP!  White background. Dieting concept.

This past year has been a battle with my food disorder.  I don’t know what else to call it.  I have an unhealthy relationship with food.  I wish I could just eat to live but that is not who I am.  I eat to satisfy every emotion. I have been overeating and binging terribly for the past year.  It started at Thanksgiving last year when I just wanted to eat normally for the Holidays.  Normally?  What was I thinking?  Even people who eat moderately don’t follow any rules at Holiday time.  This idea of just enjoying food for the holiday season put me on the road to self destruction. I did not too bad through the spring and summer but recently it has gotten out of control.

I have done a pretty good job keeping my weight under control with running a lot up until the weather changed but now the pounds have come on fast and furious.  I couldn’t believe the scale today.  Not water weight this time but true fat gain.  I did this to myself.  One bite of pizza at a time.  One cookie at a time.  I even drank root beer last week.  I haven’t had pop in over 3 years!  I am so disappointed in myself and to be completely honest I am a bit ashamed to admit where I am at. I have let myself down! I feel like I am letting all of you out there down too!

I have been looked to as an example of positive change and healthy living and look at me right now!  I am a mess!  I don’t want to stay here though.  I do desire to change and I will change!  The last time I saw these numbers on the scale was in the Spring of 2010.  I hope to NEVER see them again.  I will conquer this food disorder.  This time will be different!  I will keep on the right course with my eating. 

So where am I at today?

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Just wait till my “after” pictures on Valentine’s Day!  I can’t wait to see the difference!  My goal is to lose 10%.  21.4 pounds in 12 weeks.  I will be 193 pounds or less by Valentines Day.  I haven’t seen that number since March 2011 so it will be a tough goal to reach but I know I can do it!  I WILL do it!  What will your goal be?

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These pictures were taken February 14th 2011.  I can’t wait to be back there again and loving my body!

7 comments:

  1. Becky, I can relate! I feel the same way. I thought I had figured out how to live healthfully, but I haven't. The stress of the last year and half has really gotten to me, and I am almost back to where I started 7 years ago. So, like you, I have decided to set new goals, and work hard. I went back to weight watchers last week, and I am down almost two pounds this week! We can do this!!!

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    1. That's awesome that you are back doing Weight Watchers. It will always be hard to keep the weight off. It is just the sad truth but we can and will do this HARD thing!

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  2. I am having the same problem. I haven't gained weight, but I have eaten a lot of unhealthy foods and watched my waistline grow as fat replaces muscle. I don't really want to lose weight at this point, but I do want to lose fat and regain muscle. Because I don't have weight to lose, I am not sure this competition is for me. I commend you for your honesty. It takes guys to admit things like that! I know you can do this! Love you lady!

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  3. DITTO! Oh how I wish we lived closer. I do have one thing.....I don't know if I will ever conquer my food addiction but I do believe that I can manage it? Is that wrong thinking? Because I know that with Heavenly Father we can change all things heavens we can move mountains but I am still not sure I am suppose to conquer my food addiction. I am not sure that it is suppose to be removed? Maybe it is suppose to be made lighter by me turning to Heavenly Father's for help? I really don't mean to be negative and I am so excited and pumped for you but I wanted you opinion on this?
    xoxoxo
    Barb

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    1. I understand what you are saying. I did however experience a sweet year without cravings. I prayed a lot, and fasted every month for strength and even meditated on eating right. I didn't desire food like I did or do now. I know it is possible but my mind and spirit aren't there yet. It was hard and I was very humbled at the time. I am still too proud.

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  4. you are brave and strong and you can TOTALLY do this.
    And...I think I'm in.
    The mono has totally set me back...partially physical and now it feels largely mental. I just need to decide if I'm really up for this.

    Regardless...GO YOU!

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